Thursday, September 11, 2008

Home again. And visiting that second home?

Labor Day weekend? Over. Summertime? Basically kaput. (This is the Seattle neighborhood. After the 2nd of September, you just expect some rain and see what happens. Sun is a bonus.) But the church hunt goes on! Well... I'm not sure "hunt" is the word I'd use this week.

I want to keep trying Quest. It's the first church I "visited", the first church whose website clicked with me (pun intended), and the fact that they are willing to focus on homeless and social justice? When the rest of world wants to ignore "bums" and go to war... well, let's just say we agree on many topics.

Plus, my "first" speaker was back. I like this Leah person. She'll admit that she's not perfect, while in the same speech, harass us for not sitting in the first two rows. Blessed with intelligence and a verbage that works for me. Music wasn't as great as a few weeks ago, but it still worked for me. The sermon was telling us how we shouldn't be forming little whispering groups, discussing "what do you think about what this person did?" No, if we have a problem, we should actually go and -talk- to people about what we see. Communication! Growing a spine! Two things I'm quite fond of. ;) Misunderstandings bug me. Now I just have to get off my butt and find out how much they care about me "shunning" communion. ;) Gotta practice what was preached, I suppose...

And since I went to the 9:15 meeting, that meant I had plenty of time to make the 11 at North Seattle Friends. Y'know, check in on the home front, catch those who hadn't been at camp the previous weekend, etc. Besides, I still like my church, darnit! I was headed up to my usual spot in the soundbooth (Look, I can sit up still and prooper in one service. But if I'm gong to two services, there's gonna be some slouching in that second one. I'm only so mighty.), Lorraine caught me and gave that non-verbal gesture/look that she had a litlte speech/explanation for me. I got comfy. Short version? She'd forgotten to ask for people to take offering, which I used to do, so while the last-minute selectees were coming forward, she informed those that didn't already know that I was on a search for the love of my life. Not how I'd like it all to go, but it is what it is and that's how it is. I'm flexible.

Regardless, she expressed a desire to have me come in front of the church and tell people what was going on so I didn't pull a vanshing Philip act. (Personally? I like vanishing Philip. Anyone who has visited with me will tell ya that I exit without saying anything. I don't see a need make a big entrance or exit. I draw enough attention already, I don't need more everytime I go from A to B. What you call "rude", I call... um... humble? Maybe it's just my introvert side.) I don't get asked to speak about myself in front of church, and I honestly have no fear of crowds, so I told her whatever she wanted to do was fine.

Since it is my church, and this is my blog, I shall summarize the speech in the under used, valley-girl dialect.


L- "So, I like, found Philip... who was out... like, I dunno... shopping maybe? Getting some totally gnarly threads?"

Me- "Totally. Did you see the shine on these boots? Aren't they like, totally awesome?!"

L- "To-tal-ly. Anyways, so there's been like, I don't know... a month? And like, before then, Philip was all like, 'Dudette. Lorraine. I'm like, totally bumming. There're like, I mean, nobody cool to hang with! I'm like, crushing for a posse to go hittin' it with, and like, there're like, no peeps anywhere! I'm so totally bumming! Like, foreves, y'knnow?"

Me- "That is -so- not how I phrased it"

L- "Whatevah! So like, Phil has been out on his own? Y'know, like, searching and looking and... y'know, like, not being here! And he's like, not hating on us, c'mon... I know that's so totally what you guys were thinking. But he's totallly awesome. And he wants others who are totally awesome too! Then he might like, bring those killer dudes back to us killer dudes, and we could be like... so -totally- awesome killer dudes!"

Me- "To-tal-ly. Fer sure."


Ahem. The only thing that really set my ears on edge (and caused a cringe, I'll admit) was that she stated that I was searching for my beloved. :

A: Never in my life have I uttered the phrase, "I am out to find my beloved." Ever. Beloved? Really? You don't think I could come up with a better word than that? Fellow flannel fan. Co-comics cohort. The shoelaces to my sneakers. The remote to my tv. Someone to keep me in check. But beloved? Come now.

B: I sort of put up my shields because it's about more than being single or attached. Would I
like to be single? Well, that depends. Am I going to call off this church quest just because I find there are no females I find attractive? Nope. Friends too! Don't discount the value of having females sure, but friends are still important! I have very few Christian friends. Especially in this area. I could use more! Like... y'know... more than 3. I'm just sayin'.

Let's just say that I was mildly taken aback that it was apparently me on some colonial wife-search. But again, I'm sure my paranoia was activated, what with "defending my actions" in front of the church. ;) Besides, all I had to do was tell them I was doing fine, say maybe three sentences, and go back to my booth to hide.

Oh, and I avoided the crowd of people around me. Ick. Look, I'm a hugger. I'm all for hugging. But a crowd up people all smothering you? That massive crowd that loses pretty much all intimacy? yeah, that's not me. You want to talk to me? Talk to me. The end. You want to pray for me? Go for it. But a big blob of people doesn't comfort me. It makes me feel like I'm one joker away from a bad game of pigpile. And I'd be the pig. Happily Lorraine asked about that beforehand, and I told her I don't do that sort of group activity, given the option. :)

Next week? I dunno. I want to go back to Quest, but I drove by a Greenlake church that seemed to have my demographic going into it, and I keep telling myself I'll go to Bothell Foursquare, even though it seems like the most impersonal of all churches on my mental list. No wonder I keep putting it off... ;)

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Philip,

I owe you an apology. I completely missed the point of what you are doing. I apologize for being so insensitive and for doing so in front of the entire congregation. I'm sorry.

I do pray that you find friends and that you sense God's leading in this journey.

Blessings,
Lorraine

Cosand said...

Oh pssh.

I have two goals and you focused on one of them.

Was I surpised? Sure. Hurt? Nah.

No worries. At all. (But I still maintain I have the right to make light of the situation!)

To all you folks? If I'm ever -really- mad? You'll hear. I'll tell ya. Really. :D

Anonymous said...

Make light all you want and I'll enjoy it! Lorraine

Aimee said...

Actually, I think you draw quite a lot of attention to yourself with your disappearing act. My opinion anyway.

I'm glad Lorraine got you up there to let the church know what you were up to. You gotta let your community know what's up so they can support you. At least, that's what I think (though I'm not always good about taking this advice. hee hee)

p.s. I accidentally posted several replies under 'gardener' - but it was really me all along!