The sights and sounds of defeat

Arrgh.

One of the many things I enjoy about having a "newer" church is that nobody really expects anything from me. I don't have to help with offering, no one knows I have sound board experience, and except from "kind of" helping to deal with LCD projectors? They really don't know what this little projectionist can do to assist their service. So they don't ask. So I get to sit in the audience and just be one of the crowd with no responsiblities.

However, this doesn't mean that the service runs smoothly without me. It doesn't. At least one song a service, the powers that be will lose track of what's going on and be incapable of keeping the songs advance on the screen. Lyrics get fuddled. Guess what, we don't have any hymnals or print outs to help us along! Once you folks mess, I pretty much resign myself to being done with the song and hoping you figure it out in time for the song after that.

The nice side of me wants to believe that they're trying. That they aren't getting paid for this, and they're just attempting to help out in whatever way they can. Plus, I don't have to worry about running AV for two churches.

The perfectionist in me wants to turn around and yell up at the booth, "What are you people doing up there?! They just said the first line they're about to sing, find that slide and you're golden! C'mon now!!!"

Sigh.

I enjoy being able to mingle (even though I don't do it much). But I also enjoy a good performance. You don't see me allowing dirt on my screen at work, do you?

So I either adjust to the fact that I'll be grumpy for a song or two, or I get off my lazy little church-bum and find myself in the same position for two churches. Neither sounds very appealing.

You're not supposed to have "lesser of two evil" decisions to make when you're just trying to worship God, darnit!

A trivial matter, to be sure. But one that just doesn't want to go away...

Active, Involved, but not Employed

I have an agenda.

There, I said it. I still feel that it is a pretty harmless agenda, though. I think it would be nice to have conversations with people in church.

I know! Scandal!

Two Sundays ago? Sat next to a nice little couple, quite delightful to talk to. Had a brief chat with them this week while I was engaged in a task, and I actually remembered them and their faces. What can I say, in a new church I want to engage people.

Old church, I pretty much know everybody. I don't need to sit next to them during church, I can converse with them afterwards quite easily. We can just pick up where we left off and not have to worry about "who you are and what you're about". Just hop right into the details.

New church, not so much. I know -maybe- 3 people in any given Sunday. Odds of me sitting next to someone I know? Unlikely.

Which doesn't mean I don't see opportunities to help. For example, their slideshows? Arrrgh. Half the time I just want to run up and find out of they are paying attention. The singers jump around, I admit. All singers tend to. But sometimes the slides are just plain bad. However, if I'm up there running the powerpoint? Well then I'm just back in my role from the old church, and I'm unlikely to converse with anyone. Not my ideal scenario.

My small group is trying to organize a blood drive, so we needed to make an announcement. I'm quite used to yelling at large crowds of people, giving them information, and letting them return to their anonymous existences. I volunteered for the first sermon. No one seemed willing to "have a presence" for the second services, so I gave the shpiel for that one too. (For the record? The second shpiel was -much- funnier. But they only laughed at one joke! Oh well.)

Helping out where I can interact? Where I'm allowed to engage people? That I'll do.

Being trapped in the same surroundings I'm take the here-and-there break from?

Nope. Not yet.